International Academy for Leadership

Self-Discovery: A Facilitation Journey at IAF

This statement struck me deeply during the session of the “Moderation: Facilitation and Programme Design” Seminar on Monday, April 15, 2024, at Theodor Heuss Academy in Gummersbach, Germany. Until that moment, I had believed that becoming a facilitator meant focusing entirely on the participants. However, the truth hit me: to lead others effectively, I first needed to understand myself, my responses, and my role in the group.

As part of the International Academy for Leadership (IAF) program, I joined 28 participants from around the world, guided by facilitators Marike Groenewald and Clinton du Preez from Anew, a renowned South African consultancy. The seminar aimed to help members of FNF partner organizations in various countries by enhancing their capacity in facilitation, designing, and implementing training programs.

The Unexpected Start: A Journey That Began with Reflection

Due to a flight diversion, some participants and I arrived late and missed the first day at IAF Gummersbach. The cold Gummersbach weather gave me some time to process this delay—not as an obstacle, but as an opportunity to reflect on the journey ahead.

The “Arriving properly” was one of my favourite parts on this Seminar journey. I never realized how often I physically arrive somewhere but mentally remain elsewhere, lost in thoughts of work, responsibilities, or lingering emotions from previous interactions. This simple practice reminded me to be aware and reflect on “who am I” and “what is my response”.  Arriving properly means being present and open to the journey ahead. This was not just about physical presence, but also mental and emotional engagement.

This session began with personal reflection, facilitated by guided questions designed to explore our thoughts and emotions. With music playlist from Discord, the atmosphere became more serene and introspective. It was at this moment that I understood how music can create an inviting space for reflection and deepen connections between participants. More than just an opening exercise, it was a reminder that presence and openness are the foundation of facilitation.

Building the Foundation: Values, Trust, and Self-Awareness

The first step in facilitation is creating a "container"—a set of values and principles that would guide our interactions throughout the seminar. These values included sharing experiences rather than giving advice, trust, empathy, showing up, embracing the unknown, and listening with respect. By setting these expectations, we were creating a safe space where we could be vulnerable, share openly, and engage in authentic dialogue.

In another session, we collaboratively mapped out different types of gatherings across the world, categorized by our home continents. Initially, the exercise seemed confusing, but as the discussion unfolded, I realized its true purpose: collaboration. The goal was not just to construct a map but to learn how to work in a team, appreciate diverse perspectives, and strengthen cross-cultural communication skills.

Introduction to the Journaling Practice

The first time I opened A BOOK OF THOUGHTS: An IAF Journal, I hesitated. The blank pages felt a bit intimidating—what was I supposed to write? But as the facilitators encouraged us to simply observe and take note of what stood out, something shifted.

Each day, the journal became more than just a notebook—it became a space for reflection. I wasn’t just recording what I had learned, but also how I felt, how I showed up, and where I was growing. Some prompts were simple: How do I feel about being here tonight? Others made me dig deeper: What questions am I carrying about my journey as a facilitator? Slowly, I embraced the process, using journaling as a tool to slow down, process experiences, and better understand myself.

The Power of Facilitation: More Than Just Leading a Discussion

This seminar taught me that Being—authentic presence, building trust, and creating safe spaces—is just as crucial as Doing—structuring sessions, managing group dynamics, and achieving goals.

What makes facilitation truly effective? Reading the room. More than just following an agenda, facilitation requires us to observe group dynamics, actively listen, and respond with empathy. Sometimes, the most meaningful moments emerge when we adapt and let the process unfold naturally.

We also explored the Four Centres of Facilitation—People, Content, Outcomes, and Process. I realized that I had been operating mostly as an Organizer, prioritizing structure and agenda. However, effective facilitation is about balancing all these elements to create a structured yet engaging and meaningful experience.

Additionally, we delved into the Eight Facilitation Styles, each with its strengths and challenges:

1. Empath – Deeply understands the emotions of others, but may struggle with objectivity.
2. Enthusiast – Brings high energy, but needs to balance it with depth.
3. Peacemaker – Prioritizes harmony but might avoid confrontation.
4. Expert – Offers in-depth knowledge, but risks disconnecting from participants.
5. Captain – Focuses on efficiency but may lack flexibility.
6. Innovator – Introduces fresh ideas, but must consider participants' readiness.
7. Organizer – Manages logistics well, but might overlook participant engagement.
8. Provocateur – Challenges thinking, but does not always offer resolutions.

The Challenge: Adapting My Facilitation Style to Different Audiences

Facilitation is not a one-size-fits-all approach. In my experience working with government officials, professionalism, clear structure, and results-driven discussions are key. In this setting, I often adopt the Organizer or Expert style, emphasizing clarity and efficiency while maintaining credibility and trust. A touch of humour can ease the atmosphere, but professionalism must remain intact.

On the other hand, working with young journalists and university students requires a more interactive and exploratory approach. Here, I embrace the Enthusiast style, fostering dynamic discussions that are relevant and engaging. Managing these differences is both a challenge and an opportunity to develop adaptability in facilitation.

Reflections: Gummersbach – Serene and Profound, Berlin – Dynamic and Full of Exploration

Gummersbach provided the perfect setting for deep learning and a personal journey of self-discovery. Away from distractions, I immersed myself in discussions, reflections, and an exploration of my facilitation style. Even simple moments—journaling, sharing meals, engaging in thinking pairs, and celebrating diversity during Cultural Nights—became valuable reminders of the importance of presence and active listening

Berlin, in contrast, was a burst of energy and exploration. The city’s vibrant atmosphere offered new perspectives on facilitation, from Learning and Gathering Trends with Linus Stieldorf to a Visual Facilitation Workshop with Wiebke Koch.

One session that stayed with me was “Psychological Safety: Creating Spaces for Honest Dialogue” with Myriam Hadnes. It made me realize that creating a safe space is not just about words—it’s about how we listen, how we ask questions, and how we make people feel valued.

Another insightful session was "Facilitating & Moderation – Insights from My Heart" with Katie Guller’s. One of the biggest lessons I took away was the importance of self-awareness. Before stepping into the role of a facilitator or moderator, we must first understand our own communication style—how we respond under pressure and how our personality shapes the atmosphere of a discussion. I learned that facilitation is not just about mastering techniques; it’s about authenticity and flexibility.

Beyond the sessions in Berlin, I also had the chance to take a short trip to Cologne. This experience further deepened my understanding of history and culture while also allowing some of us to practice facilitating outdoor group activities.

Conclusion: A Journey of Growth and Transformation

Looking back, this seminar wasn’t just a series of sessions, it was a transformative experience that reshaped my approach as a Program Officer.  I am no longer just managing events, I am designing meaningful experiences.

As someone who works behind the scenes, I’ve come to realize that facilitation isn’t about having full control. It’s about bridging perspectives and creating space for meaningful dialogue. And meaning isn’t always tied to budget. Even with limited resources, a program can leave a lasting impact through small but thoughtful changes—such as structuring discussions effectively or incorporating moments of reflection

After the seminar, I began implementing small changes in our biweekly team meetings. I introduced the practice of “arriving properly”—encouraging team members to be fully present and to listen with greater awareness. At first, it felt unfamiliar. There were moments of silence that seemed unusual. But over time, the atmosphere shifted. Conversations became more engaging, and participation grew more meaningful.

This seminar was not just about facilitation; it gave me a moment to slow down and reconnect with myself. In the midst of a fast-paced and demanding routine, I learned that facilitation isn’t just about managing programs—it’s about creating space for ideas, dialogue, and deeper connections

I’m grateful to FNF Indonesia and IAF for this incredible experience. It has not only broadened my perspective but also helped me see every meeting as an opportunity to learn, connect, and grow together. I hope to carry this spirit forward in every interaction and program I lead.